Home Sweet Home

I am home.

Home. I can't believe how wonderful and blessed it feels.

I got home this evening, went out on the patio to say hello to Tux (who I am sure thinks I had abandoned him two weeks ago when I dropped him off at the vet for boarding) and check on my potted plants (which have spent the last two weeks with Rick and Ann), and just felt such a relief (and release) that the tears started to flow.

Of course, it doesn't take much to make me cry...especially when I'm tired...or when I'm emotionally exhausted...or when I feel so blessed and thankful for the life I share with Kerry here in this house, our home.

We left this house, our home, twelve days ago for a welcome and greatly anticipated vacation in Colorado. We were sitting in the DFW airport when we got word that Kerry's mom had been taken to the ER in Odessa with internal bleeding. Over the next couple of days, we divided our time between visiting with Kerry's cousin and family, enjoying the beauty of the Colorado Rockies and checking in by phone with Kerry's sisters in Odessa. By Thursday, we were no longer enjoying our time...we were sitting in a hotel room in Steamboat Springs, waiting for a call from Texas to let us know if the source of the bleeding had been found and if it had been stopped. The call came...the answer was no..and no. We went to eat, and got another call which made the question to come back home or not a definite yes. The call was from my mom...she was checking in on Kerry's mom, but she had news herself...she was to have an angiogram the following Monday. So we made all the arrangements and cancellations necessary, left SS at midnight to drive back to Denver, turn in our rental car, and catch the first flight back to DFW, then on to San Angelo. We were home about 5 hours...during which time we took a nap, took showers, and repacked...then we were on the road to Odessa by 5:00 Friday afternoon.

Kerry's mom had surgery on Saturday morning, after all other efforts to find the source of the bleeding failed. She had 18 inches of her small intestine removed. Long story short, from last Saturday to this Saturday...the surgeon did an excellent job and she is no longer bleeding. She is in A-Fib, a heart rate irregularity, but has been stabilized through medication. She is still very weak, and is very confused and disoriented. It is going to be a long, hard recovery and rehabilitation. I stayed in Odessa all week to help Kerry's sisters...my shift was 1-5 every afternoon, with occasional evening visits. Today was one of the hardest days to sit with her as she was awake, yet confused and hallucinating.

My mom's angiogram went well...only 20% blockage and NO cholesterol in her veins! (I must take after my dad.) So she wore a heart monitor for 24 hours on Wednesday. Today, her doctor's office called and told her to double the medicine she takes for a "skip" in her heartbeat. Which tells me it is probably worse than it was when she started taking the medicine. She will know more next week when she meets with the doctor.

Add to the stress of concerns for both moms the absence of my own support system, my rock, my friend, my husband....yeah...it's been an emotionally exhausting twelve days.

And yeah...it is so good to be home. Even though there is still garage sale stuff sitting around (from the weekend before we left)...and my suitcase full of sweaters and jackets and jeans from Colorado is still sitting in the middle of my bedroom floor...and there is no milk in the refrigerator...and the stack of mail is about 2 feet tall...and my laundry basket is overflowing...etc. etc.

I am home, with my husband, sitting with him on the couch with my laptop, posting a blog on high-speed internet (my mom still has dial-up and checking my e-mail and reading blogs was the most I could do), and anticipating sleeping in my MY bed on MY pillow.

Yes, I am home. My home sweet home.